I don’t own myself anymore. No one can see it, but I have chains all over my body; it’s no longer mine. I’m looking everywhere, searching on every corner, but I can’t find it — I’m lost. Lost. They got inside and stole everything: my tenacity, my freedom, my heart; even my (in)sanity. Now it’s empty, it’s all gone. Each and every part of me belongs to someone else — someone else but me. I became a broken machine, like a printer out of ink. Yes, a printer out of ink. They used me to print their papers, without any appreciation, and now there’s no more ink. I can’t print anything anymore. What saddens me the most is that I printed all their papers, but none of mine — mine are all blank. I wished someone would say, “it’s not broken, it’s just out of ink,” but I guess it’s easier to say I’m broken. Well, maybe I am. Maybe it’s impossible to fix me after so much damage. I can’t function anymore.
Have you ever noticed how fear stops us from doing things we wanna do? How often excitement gets lost in the middle of meaningless mind traps? When we finally achieve something and are able to see things through, all we once feared turns into something simple. There are a lot of creative people in the world, but most of them are completely paralyzed by fear. I was one of them. Actually, I still fear a lot of things. Lately, I’ve been trying to let excitement rule my life. I’ve seen some changes, which is great. But I know I have a long way ahead of me. Like myself, there are a lot of talented people who should let go of their fears and start creating and innovating. Write about whatever you want. Feel free. If you’d like to sing, take singing classes. Don’t work with something dull just because you need money. Chase your dreams. Do whatever makes you feel alive. Here’s a quote I really love that applies perfectly to what I’m writing.
“Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.” – Steve Jobs